My night with the bachelors and bachelorettes. "Reality" tv indeed.

Last night I did something few people actually get to do... I went to a Bachelorette viewing party with a bunch of previous Bachelors and Bachelorettes. I have to admit that I didn't know exactly what I was getting into. I'm not a big Bachelor fan. Call me crazy but I feel like searching for love by competing with 25 other (surgically enhanced) chicks for 1 guy's attention isn't my cup of tea. And the awkwardness of the show wears me out. But my beloved roommate Susan LOVES it, so I've recently started watching it with her, mostly because I love processing the most recent episode with her while we're getting ready for work in the morning.

My other beloved roommate/aunt Nikki is friends with one of the bachelors from the season of Bachelorette starring Jillian. He will remain unnamed in this blog. But if you ask me in person I'll tell you. They hung out this weekend, and he mentioned this viewing party he was going to attend, that would be taking place at a club in Hollywood, and that several other previous "contestants" would be attending. Those of you who know me are probably aware of the fact that I prefer sweatpants and my DVR to getting floozed up and heading into Hollywood. But how could I resist going with Susan who has been following this show for years and was so excited about the idea of hanging out with these people? So, wearing black skinny jeans and accessories, off we went to Hollywood.

The first good sign of the night was that we got a parking spot on the street right in front of the club. The second good sign was when we walked up to the velvet rope, and told them we were there for the Bachelorette viewing party, they unclipped that velvet rope and let us in. After that things started to get a little weird...

Susan and I walked in and went to the bar first, to get the lay of the land. I thought the bar tender was your average run of the mill martini shaker, until Susan said to him, "I know who you are. You're Robby B. You got left in the middle of the rocky mountains." Turns out our bartender was a previous bachelor contestant in the Jillian season as well! Super nice and friendly guy. I love Robby B.

Then, we proceeded to walk into the room with a small group of people (clearly reality tv "stars") sitting on couches in front of a tv, and... lights and cameras. We went and met up with the previously unnamed Bachelor. I introduced myself to a woman at the table. She told me she was Sharon from E! and asked who I'm with. I looked at her awkwardly, and said, "huh?" She then informed me that this was an E! taping of the Bachelorette viewing party for previous contestants. Whoops... Susan and I were totally crashing this taping.

At first Susan and I tried to score one of the seats near the television, until a camera guy with a boom mic started coming around to all the people sitting down and asked their name and what season they were on. At that point Susan and I promptly made ourselves scarce and sat in the back. Oh how I wish I'd made up a fake name and said I was on season 2 with Jesse Palmer!!! I feel like I could have gotten away with it.

I wish I could say that the people were super nice and that they're just like us. They're not really. These poor people are all trying so hard to put up a beautiful front, it aches with emptiness. As we watched their interactions with each other, and heard them reflecting on their time with the show, I felt like the best they can hope for is having someone decide that they want to buy into the facade. Not too much being real with each other in this context. It kind of felt like all that beauty has to be lonely.

One bachelor did bring me a shrimp taco wrapped in tin foil, which I promptly stuck in my purse.
On the way out Susan and I had a pretty jarring interaction with one of the bachelors. This was one that she'd had a crush on from the Jillian season who apparently was super sweet and caring. I can't remember his name at the moment, but he's the one that had a winery. Anyway... we went to chat with him because Susan wanted a picture. During our whole conversation he looked past us. Since we were on our way out anyway, I wanted to ask him some real questions, so I asked if it's super being awkward on the show because it doesn't seem at all like actual dating. He then proceeded to describe how "not real" it actually was. He told us that the minute he saw Jillian he knew he wasn't into her. She's 5' and 100 lbs. and he's looking for a "bombshell." I knew he'd made it pretty far into the season, so I asked if he just faked the whole thing. He then proudly said, "I liked the entire time. I just had to get to the hometown date to get publicity for my winery. I am the world's best liar."

How is one to respond to a statement like this? This guy was moderately cute. I think he is used to chicks fawning all over him, and maybe thought we were some of those chicks. Or maybe we didn't matter. But all I could do was look at him and say, "World's best liar huh? Well, everyone's gotta be good at something."

Susan and I were pretty outraged on the way out that guys like this exist in the world. Or people like this. Love, true love, is the most beautiful thing in the world. It brings out the beauty in the other person, it's self-sacrificing, it's full of hope, and joy. So this guy, who made a mockery out of love, gets his 15 minutes of fame. (Picture me flailing my arms in anger and stomping my feet).

My first response was what I thought was righteous indignation, but now I'm wondering if it was a little bit more self-righteousness. These are broken people, and the world buys into the consumption of their missing the mark about love.

I'm still processing through all of this, but I guess I was shocked by how ugly the backside of reality tv is. It's not reality at all. It's this crazy fake world, and I'm pretty sure people are missing out on the beauty of actual reality. Of letting another person seeing you as you truly are, and loving that about you.

In a nutshell, here's the lesson from the night:
Extra dirty martini - $15
Parking ticket from that sweet spot in front of the club - $55
Being eternally grateful for the actual real love in my life - priceless.